Repeating character names throughout a conversation can come across as stiff and ingenuous.

(Or worse! It could invoke memories of that old, terrible flirting tip that using someone’s name over and over when talking to them lets them know you’re really into them.)

Read the following conversation as an example:

“Jen, how’s the new job going?”

“Oh my god, Paul, it’s been great. Thanks for asking.”

“You’re welcome, Jen. I’m really glad to hear that.”

Now, read it again and think of how often you talk to your friends and use their names throughout the conversation.

Most likely, you rarely do unless you’re in a large group and need to clarify who you’re speaking to. Even then, sometimes we’ll simply catch someone’s attention through eye contact or another means.

A more natural conversation would probably be more like:

“How’s the new job going?”

“Oh my god, it’s been great. Thanks for asking.”

“You’re welcome. I’m really glad to hear that.”

Of course there will always be a need to use names at certain times, but do so with purpose.

If you’re not sure if you’re overdoing it, read the dialogue aloud. If the back and forth doesn’t feel natural, then it’s time to make some cuts.

Conversations here are simplified to provide an easy example. While the tip itself may come from issues I’ve seen frequently in manuscripts I work with, I don’t pull specific examples from my clients’ work.

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